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Lola Phoenix

Privacy boundaries

I have been in a relationship with a man in an open marriage for 3 years. In the beginning I was told his wife read our texts out of fear of him leaving her. After a year it became clear I had no interest in “stealing” her husband. However, she

Episode 88: One Rule to Rule Them All

Sometimes making a rule causes the exact problem that the rule is designed to prevent.

Trouble accepting polyamory

I’m new to polyamory. I’ve been married for 25 years & have 3 children. Long story short, my husband met someone online about 3 months ago. They have started a relationship though they have not met in person yet. She lives in another state. He will be going

Left out of a thruple

My husband and I have been together for 10 years. We have kids, cars, a home, and careers built together. We've been off and on exploring non monogamy in many forms for about 7 of these years. We've tried dating together and it didn't

Episode 87: Showering Rules

When having strict rules makes you feel controlled, coming to a compromise with a partner who wants a specific thing can seem impossible.

Episode 86: No Exes as Friends

Your new partner demands, during a period of grief, that you stop being friends with an ex and now might not be the best time to push back on the ultimatum.

Realistic emotional expectations

This may be way out there, but I'm currently struggling thru the beginning of my partner and I's attempt at non monogamy. We both wanted a hierarchical [polyamory] structure, but I quickly became overwhelmed with jealousy over everything. Because I have been feeling this way, he

Episode 85: Insecurity and Comparisons

You’re in a not so open minded city. How do you tell people you want to date that you’re currently in a polyamorous or open relationship?

Scared of competition

My wife and I just decided (well she did) that we should try and open relationship. At first I was devastated but we talked and over a few weeks we’ve been more honest about things than we ever have. We absolutely love each other, we have 3 kids and

Episode 84: Disclosure and Outing

You’re in a not so open minded city. How do you tell people you want to date that you’re currently in a polyamorous or open relationship?