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Considering polyamory

Whether you’re considering it or your partner has asked you about it, here are the entries we have for folks considering polyamory for themselves or their current relationships — both the good and the bad scenarios.

Recognising your own needs

I just started listening to your podcast and it has helped with a lot of questions, but I have one of my own. My partner and I have been together for 5 years and they recently told me they are polyamorous. We have been monogamous our whole relationship and have

Episode 80: Trying to Convince

If you’re trying to convince your partner to be polyamorous, you may not be able to “fix” them wanting monogamy. That’s what’s on this week’s episode of Non-Monogamy Help. Discussion Topic: Could you see yourself being monogamous? Listen here on or on Anchor. Visit the Anchor

Episode 78: Not Good Enough

Sometimes when your partner wants non-monogamy you can be left feeling like you’ve failed or not done enough. That’s what’s on this week’s episode of Non-Monogamy Help. Discussion Topic: What would you do if your family did not like one of your partners? Listen here on

Unrealistic personal expectations

My wife [married for 11 years] and I have been ethically non monogamous for a while, mostly swingers. We’ve never had issues about being sexually open but those activities were always together, we never really looked separately, while it helped sort through some feelings that come with going off

Episode 77: Making the Leap

If non-monogamy is a no go, should you say goodbye to a five year relationship on a hunch? That’s what’s on this week’s episode of Non-Monogamy Help. Discussion Topic: When was the first moment you sort of recognised that you might be polyamorous or interested in non-monogamy?

Pushed into polyamory

My boyfriend of just a few months decided that he will not be happy and will eventually cheat if he cannot be non-monogamous. Going into this he knew my views on being monogamous but I did not know his. He only said that in the past he's a

Episode 74: Dating Friendly

In starting out in polyamory, most people want to make rules — like no dating friends or family. It’s worth thinking more about that rule. That’s what’s on this week’s episode of Non-Monogamy Help. Discussion Topic: What makes a friend different from a partner to you? Listen

Hierarchies causing paranoia

When I met the person (A) I’m seeing now, 5+ years ago, he was seeing other people. At the time I wasn’t particularly interested in anything more than casual anyways so seeing him occasionally suited me. A few months in he told me that he was now in

Episode 71: Feelings and Friends

We create rules sometimes about what our partners can do because we’re afraid of losing them, but sometimes the rules we make don’t actually change anything. That’s what’s on this week’s episode of Non-Monogamy Help. Discussion Topic: How do you introduce the topic of STIs

Ethical vs healthy

I'm new to the world of ENM and after lots of time spent reading– I'm more confused than ever! Before I get into all of it, I guess my concerns can be boiled down into two questions: 1) Is it possible to co-create an ethically non-monogamous